Lilacs, technology and insurance - Thriving week 36

I saw this lilac bush on one of my 7am dog walks and it brought back memories of the lilac bushes in my childhood backyard in Illinois. I really liked those bushes and looked forward to the flowers each year!

September is one of the hottest months here and it has started off with a bang. We are so happy we put a mini split heat pump upstairs and it is also helping cool the main floor. A few fans, opening windows at the right time of day and the mini split and so far we have been comfortable.

I am slogging through prepping to change our health insurance and providers. I’ve read through the appropriate Kaiser federal employee Medicare Advantage plan details for this year and have a couple of questions. The 2025 one is not available yet. There is such a short enrollment change window that I’m trying to make sure we are clear in advance not only how to get through the process but also to pick the right plan.

I’m also pushing myself back into decision making mode so I’ve decided to switch to a Mac laptop. Happily my son will go to the Apple Store with me and guide me to one that will meet how I plan to use it without overbuying. He also wants to make sure it is one that will last me a long time.

I do need to find some tutorials and think about how to structure a learning plan to reduce frustration. So far my Google searches have shown me that people of all ages find switching from long time Windows use is a steep learning curve so at least I know it’s not just me. My son has convinced me to also use Google cloud storage, use Google docs instead of Office, and use a password manager. My brain and frustration levels are in for a workout. 

My desktop was bought on 2013 though as was my Kindle so it has served me well and I need to change before it has a breakdown. My son also took care of deciding on a replacement Kindle and simply ordered me one and said it was a birthday present. I do tend to keep technology a long time. That learning curve should be easy!

Covid-19 Shutdown Day 5: California to stay at home indefinitely

Our entire state is now under a stay at home order with no set end date. Just down the freeway, Los Angeles has ordered all non-essential businesses to close and only have people work from home. I think I may have to order dog grooming and hair cutting scissors!

Positive Inspiration - In case you are struggling, this article might help. How to manage anxiety and isolation during quarantine

Connecting - Realized Hubby's aunt has her 92nd birthday a week from tomorrow. Pulled a card from our stash and will get it in the mail first thing next week. We will call too.

Talked to a neighbor in person but about 10 feet apart. Going to do more of that.

Emailed my book club and got some nice responses. Everyone wants contact.

Exercise - Long walk by myself and a good dog walk.

Food & Supplies - Last night I got out the directions for the digital thermometer and made sure we both knew how to use it. Found the container of rubbing alcohol and put it nearby for sanitizing if needed. A fever is one of the key symptoms along with coughing and shortness of breath. Us older folks don't get the very high fevers that the young do so don't wait for that.

Gave in and went to Von's & CVS to get specific things and fresh fruit and veggies. Interesting what is out of stock but people were trying to stay far apart. I was able to get lots of fruit and veggies. Hubby went to Trader Joe's and got the rest. Still no toilet paper anywhere.

Learning - Nothing today.

Projects - Took a nap! Well I did pop awake at 3:30am so it was needed.

Enjoyment - Taking a nap with the dog LOL.

Minimizing Contacts - Not good today but people were trying at the grocery store and CVS was empty.

My County's Data - 19 confirmed cases including 4 in my town which surprised me. I thought the bulk would be in the 3 larger towns. We do have a higher % of elderly in our town because of the 55+ community where I live so perhaps that is it.

16 Months Later & It Feels Like Home

I don't know why it is that each time I have moved as an adult I am surprised by how long it takes to feel like the new location is home. This time it took almost 16 months. It sure was easier as a student where you met lots of people also new to the area because of school!

So what makes this feel like home now?

1. I can find my way around without thinking about it and have identified key places to go for what I want and need.

2. I have made a few local friends and am seeing the potential for others.

3. I have gotten involved in 2 organizations which gives me some scheduled activities. I've also tried and decided against quite a few activities/organizations.

4. I've adjusted my exercise activities and wardrobe somewhat to fit the change in climate.

5. We have finished fixing the things that were identified as problems when we bought our new home and have found that the homes spaces are working for us.

6. We have found ways to integrate ourselves back into the daily lives of family after 20 years of being across the country and flying in for brief visits. This is still a work in progress though. If you move to be close to family again please don't be surprised if after the initial flurry of time together  you find that they are back in their routines and you don't exactly have an ongoing place in those. It doesn't mean they don't want you to - its just an adjustment.

If you are quite outgoing or are passionate about hobbies or activities that you can jump into in your new location, you may find that feeling at home comes about much faster. If you are even more introverted than I am, have few hobbies that involve others or feel sad about leaving your former home, it may take you longer and require a lot of concerted effort to feel at home.

I recently read a book that might help if you are struggling in a new location or planning a move and feeling anxious about how well you can adjust.

This book is partly a memoir of how she tried out various strategies to become connected to her new hometown after moving very frequently and partly reporting on social science research and/or experiences and data from other sources.

Don't forget to take care of yourself when making big life changes

Going through a big life change? How about a cross country move? Add in downsizing, daily chores, aging body and much more to create a time when you definitely need to prioritize taking care of yourself along with getting everything done.

I haven't been following my own advice. Skipping exercise. Stress eating by loading up on carbs and having an extra glass of wine. So what am I doing about it?

One thing is that I decided to invest in getting advice on nutrition in an integrated medicine context within the parameters of my particular body health and medical conditions/medications. I had the first meeting yesterday and we discussed a lot that I know I should do, but also some things I didn't know or hadn't thought about.

That included the impact of taking a daily low dose of antibiotic and how to  counter that nutritionally. Why I have ridges on my fingernails. The fact that I may have a low level of stomach acid and how to  check that out (this could explain why I no longer like to eat high acid foods such as oranges, strawberries and some apples). How my diet may contribute to inflammation in my body.

She brought over a nifty scale that in addition to measures body fat, muscle and bone %s, visceral fat and how many calories you can eat to maintain your current weight if you are totally inactive. It even gives you an estimate of your body age for what that is worth.

I'm looking forward to her follow up report as I want the recommendations to see what I can do right now. Then our meetings are on hold until I get to CA and unpack a bit. We will do follow ups and weekly phone support via phone or skype. No more nifty scale measures though!

Overall my short terms nutrition goals are to
- Increase my hydration and do this consciously as I typically don't feel thirsty and I prefer coffee over other liquids.
- Plan breakfasts and lunches to get more fiber and protein - we do dinner quite well.
- Create some snack combos that are healthy and curb my cravings for sugar and fat (cookies anyone?).
- Add some probiotic rich foods and/or supplements to counter the impact of the antibiotic (yogurt and kefir top the list right now as fermented foods tend to have too much salt for me).
- Explore ways to balance stomach acid in addition to idea of eating more bitter greens which I do love. Not sure about drinking apple cider vinegar LOL.


Today at Trader Joe's I bought some unsweetened Kefir to try, a women's multivitamin and some hummus for snacks. A start.

What are you doing just for yourself?

Just Breathe!

We are scheduled to sign the realtor contract for selling our current house this Wednesday evening. Then one month until the listing goes up.

I have a lot of goals for this year but I think the overriding one is to just BREATHE. BREATHE through the stress of being out of control of the pace of events. BREATHE through the uncertainties of how all these changes will work out. BREATHE through my fears about driving cross-country with a dog with health issues. BREATHE & don't eat comfort food when finding my mind blank and blood pressure rising. BREATHE through the anxieties of potentially owning two houses at once with massively depleted bank accounts and double monthly home expenses.

I am confident it will all be fine in the end, but the process of getting there is huge and could be overwhelming if I let it be. I know from moving before and from leading large work projects that one step at a time with a good plan gets it done. Now if it were just that easy to address the emotional parts of life upheavals - even ones that are sought out!

On the check that off front, the main bath remodel is finished! We are not happy with some things but we won't be living with it LOL. It does look great - no longer stuck in the early '70s.

For those of you who wanted to see the finished product here it is. The goal was to have it be seen as a guest bath with a spa feel but still fit in with our 1941 house. Why do tiny spaces cause so much money to remodel?!!!

Allegies, stress, contractors and classes

Welcome to Atlanta in the Spring where we check the pollen count before engaging in any outdoor activity! We are really suffering this year but this morning I decided it is a cold type thing on top of allergies and oddly that makes me feel better about feeling badly.

I'm also acknowledging that I am stressed about moving, etc. Time to be kinder to myself. It hasn't helped that my husband has been in pain from a tooth problem and neck problems as well as allergies/cold problems. Well, we will just have to buck up I think.

On the preparing to move front we have had two contractors over and are waiting on estimates. We will have to replace two windows but found out we can just fix the third one (yeah!). The main floor bathroom redo will include a new tub and tile surround, new floor, new vanity counter top and sink. I am hoping we can reface the existing vanity to save money there. Since we are doing this to get top dollar in resale price and not to please ourselves, we are also going to hire someone to help us pick out materials for this renovation and make tweaking/painting/light fixture change recommendations for the rest of the house. Onward.

I started 4 senior university classes this week and like 3 of them. I took advantage of the one change per term option and switched the 4th one to something I hope I will enjoy more.

That's it here. What is up with you?

Yikes - Less than a year until house is on the market

This is really starting to feel real! We did someone backward planning from our intended date to put our Atlanta home on the market and we have only about 11 months to get it ready depending on what the realtor suggests re: listing timing.

Some things need to be done this summer such as painting the outside of the house. Any landscaping needs to happen in the fall with a pruning and cleanup session right as the listing goes up. There are a lot more things to do so being me I have created a list of questions for the realtor who we hope will make time to come by very soon! Then I can figure out the tasks in order and start chipping away at them.

Do we need a termite bond? Do we need to have the chimney swept? What about a pre-emptive home inspection? How much do we really need to spruce up the house? Etc. many times over.

We are going to spend some serious time checking out one of the areas we are thinking of living in S. California when we are there visiting family in early May. Hoped for move date is June 2017.

My focus is really on making this relocation as low stress as possible while maximizing the money we get for this house.

I am also really focused on not buying anything we don't really need in the next 14 months as we will ONLY move what is in great condition, very useful, at least liked if not loved or essential to daily life and not easily replaceable. That means lots of changes.

I'm only half joking when I say I will be starting an Amazon purchase list to have delivered to our next home right as we get there! Worn out frying pan but use one 4 times a week on average. Toss. Order new one just like we want. Repeat.

Exciting. Scary. Challenging. I could go on.

Seems that life had different plans than I did

I usually love changes and in fact seek them out but I like to be the one who initiates the change. I don't like imposed changes but am getting better at rolling with them.

Last week I wasn't sure if I could travel to CA on our planned vacation and be in good humor given how much my neck hurt. Two PT visits and follow up exercises got me to the point where I could.

Then my husband got sick and the antibiotics prescribed aren't working or at least not quickly enough. Vacation cancelled and all travel plans and arrangement reversed including the one night prepaid non-refundable hotel room. Boo.

Is there any silver lining in this?

- We have a credit with Southwest Airlines that we have until December 19th to use. We certainly will make this trip before then.

- I can go to PT this coming week and finish fixing up my neck/spine.

- Hubby will get in to see a doctor early in the week and we can start trying to find a fix for his illness.

- I'll have time to see if I can do this year's taxes myself using last year's corrected ones as a template. Our state lets people over 62 exclude interest income and I didn't know that! If I can't do it I have time to research whether to buy software or send to the accountant who spotted the error and did 3 prior year's amended returns too. Now that was a good return on investment.

- Everyone was very kind, loving and gracious about our upending their plans too. Thanks kids, FIL, BIL, and dog sitter extraordinaire!

Looking back - Moving forward

In just over 18 months my husband can retire with a pension and then we will sell our home and move across the country back to California. I am going to use the next year to prepare myself and our home for these changes as much as I can by myself. Then we will hit preparation hard together.

First I want to look back at our California life and style of almost 20 years ago and see what I would like to recapture right now as well as when we move back.

- I liked being out and about more. We lived outdoors much more than we do in Atlanta as the weather and our home were very conducive to that. I walked most mornings for exercise, we hiked and biked and generally were more physically active. Part of that was being 18 1/2 years younger as well as having active young teen and young adult children living with us, but it was mostly that our environment encouraged it.

- I liked being thinner. I weighed somewhere around 115 - 118 instead of the 133 I weigh now. Again, I was younger and hadn't reached menopause BUT I see women my age who have managed to stay thin. They probably don't eat muffins, biscotti and cookies LOL. Losing 5 pounds would be great; 10 would be amazing.

- I liked that we spent more time having fun with friends and family and a lot less time watching TV or reading. We seem to have hunkered down by ourselves on a daily basis these past 10 years or so.

- I liked that we had a less stuff in a smaller home that housed more people as well as a larger dog. We spent less time cleaning and did less home maintenance. A larger home and yard with more stuff is harder with each year that passes. My husband remarked recently that it is amazing that we have kept up with this house and yard for 18 1/2 years as we do most of the work ourselves.

- I was out and about more doing meaningful things not just running errands and that was better. True, I was working at a professional career, but still I did a lot of other things and wasted less time.

So what changes can I make in the next few months to start living more like that again?

Exercise daily rain or shine, hot or cold!!! Preferably getting outdoors but inside if the weather is too inclement.
- A long challenging walk, Pilates session or a stretch or strength video inside.
- I want to include a strength workout 3 times a week - Pilates counts as one time. I need to rearrange the study so that it is easy to do this early in the morning without bothering my husband.
- If a weekend has decent weather take an urban hike together.
- If I need to acquire clothing to make outdoor exercising easier then do so.

Develop eating habits that will reduce my weight to what it was when we moved here 18 1/2 years ago. I read that to lose 1 pound a month you need to cut about 250 calories a day. Half will be exercise and so that leaves cutting 120 calories a day from my diet each day. I should be able to do that.

Invite friends to dinner/brunch or out to lunch.

Seriously Marie Kondo my own stuff using her method. Encourage Hubby to do the basement and shed jointly so those aren't such a big chore closer to selling the house.

Changing habits by setting intentions

As my readers know, I have been struggling with how often I go to the coffee shop and buy a treat as well as healthy habits overall. Trying to not do something is different than trying to do something so I am making an effort to state my positive intentions during the day.

Yesterday it was that I would only buy what was on my Whole Foods grocery list and head straight home. Yesterday's eating intention was to eat meals that would hold me without a snack until the next meal. Today my intention was that I would shower after I did my work out. I also stated to myself that I would have a large salad for lunch today.

I'm thinking that the urge to head to the coffee shop about 3pm each day has more to do with being bored and feeling housebound as well as being my low energy time of day than it does with wanting coffee. I do have coffee at home. I'm trying to have a plan in mind of something to do each afternoon instead. I'll probably switch many of my errands to after lunch instead of morning. I am a morning person so I tend to power through my to do list in the morning and then fade mid-afternoon. Time to change my day's routing to up my energy in the afternoon without eating sweets while having a coffee out!

Its early days yet but I am finding this approach works much better for the way I work! Breaking habits without something to substitute for the undesirable habit is virtually impossible - at least for me.

Have you tried an approach similar to this or another way of changing your habits? Would love to share ideas.

Moving talk

We are seeing For Sale signs popping up in front of houses around our neighborhood and we are at the 2 year countdown point for putting one up on ours. That assumes my husband retires at the end of May 2017 when in fact he may pick a later date in the year.

Regardless we are spending more time talking about the logistics of preparing for and accomplishing a cross country move.

A neighbor loaded stuff into a PODs container before putting their house up for sale. Should we consider that mode of moving our belongings vs. a rental truck vs. regular movers? Has anyone had experience with PODs for moving?

Who is likely to buy our house - someone who will live in it as is and slowly improve it, someone who will do a major renovation and/or addition before moving in, or a developer who will raze it and build a gigantic house on our big flat lot which is unusual in this part of town?

Could we do a For Sale by Owner? Not my preference but we are going to talk about it at least.

What should we repair or redecorate in the next two years based on how best to market our house for the least investment? We definitely are not going to remodel the baths of kitchen. We probably will have the exterior trim painted and some of the interior. We are fixing soon the retaining wall and stairs down the hill into our wooded area. It looks like we have found a reasonable approach and contractor for that. At the same time we will replace some dying but highly visible bushes so they have time to fill in.

How much of our stuff are we taking with us and how do we go about sorting and de-acquisitioning the rest? How far in advance do we need to start seriously doing this?

How do you transport a dog across the country without it getting lose or having a terrible trip?

Where will we live in California? What are the "must haves" for each of us? What can we afford? Will we want to rent the first year?

As you can imagine there is a lot to discuss and decide! Any resources or experiences that you can share would be most helpful.

Good reading in March

I read a lot of books and most of them are fairly ho-hum but this month I read two that I really enjoyed and would recommend depending upon your interests.

First is Better Than Before by Gretchen Rubin who also wrote The Happiness Project and other books. I have been struggling with my inability to stick with the habits I think I want to have in retirement although when I was working 50 to 60 hours a week with lots of deadlines I had little trouble! Finally an explanation for how my personality and habit formation work together. I'm trying to adopt some of the ideas I found in this book to my exercise habit formation and then move on from there.

Second is the latest installment in the Mary Russell and Sherlock Holmes series. You have to be hooked on the idea of Sherlock Holmes and his much younger wife as a storyline but I am and enjoyed this book as much as all of the preceding ones. I am even thinking of going to a day of the local Sherlock Holmes convention in mid-April!





I hope someone else enjoys these too.

Resisting the buying urge while running errands

Yesterday I left the house to do three things: ship a book I had sold, buy mouthwash and pick up a prescription. I succeeded in only spending money on those three things but not without giving myself a couple of lectures!

First stop was the post office. Right next door to my favorite coffee shop where had I stopped for a while the day before! Love their coffee and pastries. Perhaps just grab a non-fat latte? Nonononono!

Then to the drugstore. Look, kleenex is on sale! We have 3 extra boxes at home and I am committed to not stockpiling so - nonononono! But the laundry detergent I use is on sale! Oh yeah, I have 2 1/2 containers of it sitting at home and it takes us about 3 months to go through one. No again.

I made it home with nothing extra but it would have been so easy to mindlessly add more food and spending on stockpiling to my morning.

Tough stuff this self-control LOL!

Helping us stop buying stuff we don't need (or even want really)

Trying to stop buying stuff you don't really need? For help understanding the impulse and some great questions to ask before you spend that money check out this post at Wisebread about why our brains want to buy new stuff even when we don't need it?

Here's another article that may help - Great Depression Saving Tips. I especially like this part:

"Apply the stranger test to purchases. Picture a stranger offering you the cash value of the purchase or the purchase to you, and figure out which one you would pick. If you pick the cash over the item, then you should seriously reconsider buying and just make do with what you have instead."

I'd skip the part about saving things to use later though. Unless you have a specific use in mind it just add to the clutter of stuff to deal with in your home.

In the spirit of this post, I am using up categories of items before I buy another.

I threw out the cheese but kept the Greek yogurt

If I was a more humble person I would tell my Hubby he was right but who wants to encourage their spouse to comment more on their food choices LOL. As part of the Engine 2 Diet Challenge eliminate dairy week I read carefully the label on the pepper jack cheese that I really, really like (after I had it on a sandwich!). Hubby was right. Way to high a level of fat overall and of saturated fat specifically. The half package that was left went into the trash.

I have two cartons of Trader Joe's Greek yogurt in the frig too and they aren't too bad on the measures I am targeting - saturated fat and sugar. No fat but some sugar. I eat half a carton at a time with fruit as a snack or part of breakfast so I am going to finish them and then decide if I am buying any more. I already switched to soy milk as my cartons of milk kept spoiling before I finished them. We have used a non-dairy butter substitute for years so I'm done with this week's challenge.

Next week's challenge is to eliminate all meat, poultry, fish and eggs. Not going to happen in this house, but I will increase the number of days we have vegan dinners and make other meals more "plant strong". This part of the challenge will have to wait a week as we will be on vacation in N CA starting Thursday and so I will be focusing on how to eat healthfully when staying at someone else's house and eating out a lot.

How are any changes you are trying to make in your diet going?

Engine 2 Diet/Plant Centric Eating

Oh, the internet and social media do drive our choices these days don't they. I saw a posting on Facebook about a friend attending the Engine 2 Diet Challenge kick off at her local Whole Foods store, looked up when it was happening at my nearby store and signed up. I went to the first of 4 sessions tonight which was on cutting out dairy products which is relevant because Hubby is somewhat lactose intolerant and uses light plain soy milk although he eats some cheese. It was interesting and we got to try different nut, oat, soy, etc. milks. I won a carton of almond milk. What I didn't do was by the Engine 2 Diet book for $25. They have a website with lots of recipes and Whole Foods has recipes on their website too. And of course vegan recipes abound.

I am interested though in seeing how we can change our diet to help reduce our marginally high "bad" cholesterol levels. Tonight's dinner was ratatouille (always makes me smile while thinking of the movie of the same name), sourdough French bread (thanks Trader Joe's) and salad. Oops, forgot the wine for me and beer for Hubby.

Next week focuses on how to eliminate meat/poultry/fish - which we will simply reduce. I like being able to try different products without buying them so I will keep going. It helps me decide what to try which will increase our repertoire of foods.

A recipe passed out tonight was for kale-almond bruschetta which I think I will try for the next book club meeting.

Are you making any changes this year in your cooking or eating habits to improve your health?

On the first day of (Hubby's) furlough ...

We put our fingers in our ears and sang la la la la whenever the news shows talked about it and determinedly talked of other things!

I went about living my retirement by going to my OLLI classes and learning more about Emily Dickenson than I ever would have thought to ask. Walked to and from class, took the poodle princess to a big park for a brisk walk around a very small lake while it smelled a bit like Fall, and suggested we go out to dinner to celebrate Hubby's first ever furlough. We walked to dinner and back as well.

This could go on a long time and we are definitely not planning to go out to dinner each day LOL. In fact we are looking into how soon Hubby can apply for unemployment. We also decided that going to CA to help a son and DIL move was not a good idea - mostly due to the short notice involved, previously scheduled medical appointments, etc. but also due to the cost and the need to be able to go back to work if the shutdown ended. I know it was the right decision but feel a little sad all the same that I won't be seeing my kids soon!

We do plan to go on some short hikes, doing some home maintenance and continue to enjoy free or low cost entertainment in our area. We have theatre matinee tickets for Saturday with friends and they have invited us to come to their house for lunch ahead of time. It will be a combo staycation and get caught up time at least for now.

Would you like to shake your life up?

I had lunch today with some former colleagues and out of the 5 of us 3 had shaken their lives up to some degree or made decisions to do so. One had taken a big promotion. Another had turned in her retirement paperwork and scheduled knee replacement surgery. The third had moved, taken a job after 4+ years of early retirement and her husband had been laid off. The other two of us just kind of listened.

I think the person with the most energy and zest for her changed life was the one with the biggest changes. Not that she is happy her husband was laid off from his job the day she started hers, but her big new job is very exciting and gets her "out in the world" more again. They downsized their housing and really are happy about that. Interestingly, she had decided to really shake things up in 2013.

That may be what it takes. Have you ever felt ready to make big changes in your life? I keep putting mine on hold until my Hubby retires but I am going to have to rethink that.

Happy Friday!

So I announce my retirement and am asked to take on 2 new projects

But I said no thanks. I am really feeling good about this decision as I could no longer summon any enthusiasm for the type of work I have done in the past. I feel an incredible sense of lightness and possibility!

Once we are home from our July family visits I am going to get busy with some new things. On the top of my list is joining a nearby women's gym. I've scheduled a couple of lunches to start brainstorming my next activities and to socialize. I found out last night that one of my book club friends has just retired and another is retiring in February so hopefully we can spend more time together. Hubby is working for 4 1/2 more years so we aren't headed for retirement together right now.

Right now I'm also working on a bucket list for the summer. We have lived here almost 16 years and I've never been to the contemporary art museum for example. There is a Latin jazz outdoor concert next Friday night. I'm going to research other things, especially free ones, and get them all on my schedule. I intend for the next part of my life to be joyous and busy with the right things. Have you made this transition or thought about how you will approach it?

Today's Decluttering Items
Binder and it's contents

Incremental effort and progress

"What can you do for 15 minutes a day that, by this time next year, will have added up to something remarkable?"

That is my horoscope for yesterday. Now I don't believe in horoscopes, but I found this question very interesting.

Want to feel more fit? Walk, stretch or workout 15 minutes a day.

Want to feel closer to your loved ones? Give them your undivided attention 15 minutes a day.

Want to save money? Fix your lunch to take to work - yup, 15 minutes a day.

Interested in eating healthier meals? Spend 15 minutes a day planning or cooking them.

Want to finish that book? Read for 15 minutes a day.

Have a task you hate to do? Mine is cleaning house and I can stand to do it 15 minutes a day.

So many things to accomplish and so little time to invest. What will you start doing with 15 minutes a day?