Do you take care of your belongings and do the chores you can?

It's been a while since I thought about where my "do your own chores", use it up, fix it, make do, etc. mindset came from. Not that I don't know! My Mom and Dad really believed this as well as having to do so for many years earlier in their marriage do to financial concerns. Later on it was more due to being perfectionists! Fortunately my Mom has accepted that she has to hire people to do things for her at this stage of life but that is another story.

There was a point where we hired a housecleaner. We had a preschooler and a teenager who were involved in assorted activities that we supported, worked very long hours and just wanted some time to do other things that were more fun. We quickly found that the cost was not worth the time savings for us and went back to doing it ourselves. Of course both sons were also trained in all housekeeping skills and helped out and as adults they continue the tradition of doing most things themselves.

So what have we done lately that is just routine for us. I mentioned renting the right saw so that Hubby could take down the damaged fence sections in the woods. I fixed a small hole in a favorite shirt so it will last another year hopefully and hand washed an alpaca sweater rather than having it dry cleaned. I used a box we had plus drawing paper for packing to ship a book sold on Amazon. Due to decluttering I was able to repurpose a small plastic storage container to hold small kitchen items making a drawer less cluttered.

What to we outsource? Mostly things that are beyond our skill levels or current physical capabilities. There is a crew taking down our at risk trees. There will be a crew building a new retaining wall. However we first try to think through if there is a way we could do the work such as when we rented a saw rather than hiring someone to do the work.

I am much less of a perfectionist than my parents yet continue to live this tradition. I wonder how many of you were raised the same way or, if not, have come to do for yourself for other reasons?

Me and my "stuff" (or how I want to deal with possessions, lifestyle and happiness)

I have realized that my goal is "lagom" the Swedish concept that can be translated as "the right amount" and defines the relaxed minimalism described by miss minimalist in this post. This is one gigantic goal!

So no hoarding or stockpiling, no extreme limits on the number of possessions, always considering the impact personally and globally of deciding if and what to purchase, and defining carefully what is "enough" to bring happiness without being burdensome. It is a big goal because it requires really being aware of who I am and what I truly want right now and continuing to do that as time goes on. A very conscious mindset all the time is required I think although perhaps it will become a habit.

Contentment. Fun rather than chores. True enjoyment of food and objects that are bought. Assessing the current usefulness of "tools" presently owned. By tools I mean all material objects.

Shopping secondhand first.  Refining (curating?) the collection of items acquired during the first 64 1/2 years of my life. Experiences and people over things - hence our large travel budget. Knowing that gifts don't have to be kept. .

And it means for me living with desires for acquisition for a while before buying. Not responding to those "I want ...." thoughts for at least a week. Good thing I love making lists!

Currently I have a home maintenance purchase list that looks like this:

Plant fertilizer
Compost?
3 clothes hooks
2 fluorescent tubes
Shower door bottom strip replacement

I've been waiting for the discounted Home Depot gift card I purchased through the online resale market to arrive before going shopping and my list kept changing while I waited. I found some plant fertilizer stored away. I need to see if there is something lurking in the shed that I can use instead of buying compost. I found out the light fixture by the washing machine in the basement is the problem not the light tubes and eventually the lights come on. If I had rushed to the store when each item popped into my head I would have even more things I don't need stored in the basement and shed.

I also have a secondhand store shopping list. I bought 3 things on my list earlier this week when I went to my favorite thrift store that raises money for animal rescue groups. I also dropped off some things for them to sell. I have realized since that trip that I really don't need or even want some of the things on my list. So I will end with this:

“Buy less. Choose well.” – Vivienne Westwood

Little changes that are good for the environment and/or pocketbook

I get satisfaction out of saving money where it doesn't impact living a joyful life. Please not that going out of coffee is a requirement for living a joyful life for me LOL.

Lately I've been trying to not have to buy more plastic bags even though my shopping habits result in fewer grocery bags being brought home and used for trash in the kitchen. It is amazing how many types of already used bags I have been able to find to use for kitchen trash. Bread wrappers, dog food and dog treat bags, larger newspaper bags, cereal box liner, lined coffee bean bag, etc. I'm going to see how long I can go without buying plastic trash bags.

I also don't like to buy zip lock bags except for sandwich bags for Hubby's lunch items. I wash most larger ones and reuse them as long as possible but was throwing away the ones used for freezing raw meat. Solved that by using bread bags after wrapping the meat to prevent freezer burn.

I also started saving vegetable scraps and peelings to make broth as we rarely have chicken bones to use. I made some this morning to use to make lentil and spinach soup. What a great use of "trash". We don't compost but if you do the used peelings could still be dumped in a compost pile. Mine go in the trash unfortunately.

I'm looking for some other small ways to change our habits and save a bit. I want to spend on travel, theater, good food, time with friends, donations to causes I care about and not on things like plastic bags!

Ideas?

Let's read about consumerism

I think I will read some books about American's obsession love of consumerism in this most consumser-ist month of the year. I should clarify that at this time I am interested in this from a sociological, political and/or historical perspective - not from a personal consumption perspective.

I've read in other years:

- Not Buying It: My Year Without Shopping - Judith Levine
- A Year Without Made in China - Sara Bongiorni
- Overdressed - Elizabeth L. Cline
- and others about Affluenza, the garbage epidemic, etc.

Now I'm looking for some new reads that specifically focus on consumerism and these seem like candidates although my library doesn't have either of the first two. I will order the first one via interlibrary loan as buying them seems too ironic. The third one is in at the library and I'll check it out.

- Shiny Objects: Why We Spend Money We Don't Have in Search of Happiness We Can't Buy - James A. Roberts 2011

- Ad Nauseam: A Survivor's Guide to American Consumer Culture - Carrie McLaren 2009 (a bit old perhaps)

- Buying In: The Secret Dialogue Between What We Buy and Who We Are -- by Rob Walker 2008

Can anyone suggest some other recently published books about consumerism in America that are really good reads?

The True Cost of Stuff and other interesting links

Head over to the mnmlist to read a thought provoking post about The True Cost of Stuff - how does it make you feel about shopping for new anything?

Want to store fruit and vegetables without plastic? Here's a guide from the Berkeley Ecology Center which also has lots of other interesting information. How to store fruits and vegetables

When the shopping urge hits you, read this instead How to be rich without a lot of money or stuff

Today's Decluttering Items
2 excess shipping boxes

Yikes! Lots of plastic touching our food

So how did that inventory of food related plastic turn out?

We buy lots of food wholly or partially packaged in plastic: Cereal, dried fruit, pasta, rice, legumes, bread products, crackers, chicken broth, canola oil, honey, brown sugar, maple syrup, baking powder, nuts, peanut butter, mayonnaise, ketchup, salad dressing, BBQ sauce spices, tea, mil, soy milk, nondairy spread, mustard, sun dried tomatoes, yogurt, hummus, cheese, lunch meat, meat, fish, frozen vegetables and fruit, frozen waffles and pancakes, veggie burgers, coffee, and lined cans. Toothpaste and mouthwash count too as they go in our mouth.

We store food in plastic containers, bags and wrap on serve it on plastic trays at times. We use plastic to prepare food: lettuce spinner, Teflon pans, nylon spatulas and spoons, measuring spoons and cups, whisk, pastry brush, vegetable scrubber, bowl, strainer, blender, food processor, waffle iron and ice bucket. Some of these items are rarely used or are hard plastic which I believe is less dangerous so they are low priority.

I did pull out some plastic containers that have the telltale sign of having microwaved tomato based food in them. They will be re-purposed to hold non-food items if possible and, if not, recycled.

So what is the plan? I am going to try to find substitutes for items as they are used up or in the case of plastic food storage slowly replace with non-plastic items. I started by moving three old Pyrex casseroles with lids that are never used into the food container drawer. I'm going to save a few jars to use to store items only available in plastic containers or to use for leftover food storage. I'll continue to reuse plastic produce bags and when they finally run out try to find non-plastic replacements. We do use plastic shopping bags as trash bags so I expect that will continue as will recycling what plastic we can.

First up on the research list is a glass orange juice container to replace the old plastic one.

Today's Decluttering Items
2 foreign coins worth a whole $0.08 and from an African country we never visited. Did you know you can send them to UNICEF as a donation?

Choosing where to spend our "optional" money - what does it say about us?

Some of my friends have gotten very interested in helping me look as good as possible at my son's wedding in May. I had a makeup session with one friend, another has lent me a sparkly silver cardigan in case it is as chilly as I expect, and yet another is encouraging me to get a pedicure since my dress shoes are open toe. One of them wanted to lend me some beautiful earrings, but I don't have pierced ears. Such lovely friends!

Since I stopped wearing makeup years ago and have never paid for manicures/pedicures, the idea of spending on those on a regular basis caused me to pause and think about where we choose to spend the money we don't "need" to spend. Some big optional spending categories for us are travel (mostly to visit family), gifts, Pilates private sessions, the Poodle Princess' expenses, and eating out. Others are technology (cable package, buying a larger tv this week and a Kindle), wine/beer, art classes, and theatre/movie tickets. I guess I should add having two cars as I no longer work and we could manage with one although it would be a pain and seriously limit my mobility as there is poor public transportation here. We don't spend much on cell phones, clothing, home furnishings, or books/magazines although we do get the local newspaper and use the library a lot. We do max out our retirement accounts which is chunk of money in itself.

Apparently from our spending patterns we value time with family, experiences, having a pet, gift giving, staying fit, and saving money. In fact we would spend a lot more on some areas such as travel if we weren't concerned about saving for retirement and didn't have such a costly house to operate. I'm hoping that we can shift the proportion of money going to savings and housing vs. travel and fun once we retire and sell this house. I don't see us having one car though unless we can manage to live in a location with great public transportation and good services within walking distance.

The only short term change planned is to stop the Pilates private sessions and use the now extra tv and existing dvd player to set up an exercise space. I'm also planning to join a gym that has Pilates classes and is a bargain because our insurance offers a discount on membership - I have to commit to a 3 month membership and will do that soon. I'll spend some of the savings on therapeutic massages as I am no longer seeing the physical therapist for my "frozen" shoulder but it is healing very slowly and still hurts. We will also soon be finished paying for my orthodonture but I'm sure some other health care expense will pop up.

Have you ever looked at your spending in terms of what it says about your values?

One last holiday gift for you

Courtney Carver posted this lovely gift on her terrific blog, Be More With Less, and I want to send it to all of you! Thanks for visiting my blog and for you lovely comments. I hope you are enjoying the last few days of 2012 and looking forward to 2013.

Thought for the day - Works for me

VOTE!

It may be inconvenient or annoying to stand in line but its important to exercise this right. As a woman, I'm glad the suffragettes worked so diligently to get the law changed to provide me with this right. So much so that I vote even when I know my choice has little chance of winning. Make your voice heard!

Vote: Have you? Will you? I did today!

I always vote even when I know an election will not go to the candidate I support. I think about how long women struggled to get the vote. I think about all the people around the world who have died for the right to vote. So I head off and mark my choices and am happy to do so. Today I was especially happy as it only took 15 minutes at the early voting location I chose.

Random acts of kindness

Last Spring I was able to observe a very touching random act of kindness. A man was carefully counting out his money at our used book sale and seemed to be struggling to come up with the approximately $20 to get the books he wanted. Another man who had just finished paying for his selections, handed us a $20 bill and said that he would like to get the books for this person. The recipient was close to tears as he thanked the donor. At the time I thought it was touching.

Yesterday the man in line in front of me at the coffee shop said he would like to buy the drink of the person behind him. He only got a regular coffee; I always get a latte. It felt very uncomfortable to me even though he said it was simply a random act of kindness. I did thank him graciously but it left me wondering about how others feel in these situations.

Have you ever been a recipient of a "random act of kindness" that involved money? If so, how did you feel? Could it have been done in a better way?

Wow, that book really impacted me!

I just finished reading "Over-Dressed: The shockingly high cost of cheap fashion" by Elizabeth Cline and I went and pulled 2 of my tops, the shorts and dress from the donate pile.  I can wear the tops as is.  The shorts can be taken in.  The dress can be turned into a skirt that I think I will like.  I know how to sew and I need to wear what I have purchased.  I liked it once so I can find what that like was or redo it to fit better and get on with using what I have.

Support your local merchants - pay in cash

I was buying dog food this morning at a locally owned pet store and asked if they had to pay a swipe charge if I used my credit card.  The answer was yes.  We talked further and at least for this merchant he said the cards that cost him the least are ones through credit unions, ones that offer reward points for the use cost him a lot and the highest rate was from AMEX.  In trying to be more conscious about my buying decisions - on many levels - I have decided to add paying cash when buying from local/small businesses to the list of my intentions.  I want to have choices that aren't mega corporations or chains and so I shop at these type of stores when I can.  I certainly can make a point to bring cash and make a small difference that way.

So here is where my recommitment to consciously responsible consumerism has me:
- try to find products made in the USA
- pay cash to small/local merchants
- buy what is NEEDED not on impulse (especially applies to clothing)
- schedule some exploration of local thrift shops to broaden my buying options to used items

So where is my stuff from and who makes stuff in the US?

After writing yesterday's post I decided to go see where the 66 items hanging in my closet were from.  No surprise, it turns out they are quite a well traveled internationally - more so than I am!  The surprise was that I actually have 3 items of clothing made in the USA.

So here's the breakdown:
3 - Bahrain
6 - Bangladesh
4 - Cambodia
25 - China
4 - Hong Kong
1 - India
1 - Indonesia
1 - Japan
6 - Jordan
1 - Mexico
1 - N. Mariana Islands
2 - Sri Lanka
7- Vietnam
3 - USA
1 - Unknown

I also stumbled upon a list of manufacturers of clothing and other things that make their products in the US.  The blog China Ate My Jeans  provides a list of made in USA resources.  If you are interested read the comments section on that page as their are other recommendations.  I learned from her post that Karen Kane clothes are made in the USA now and I know I've seen their clothing at Macys (Dillards and Belks are supposed to carry them too) so I will have to pursue that although they don't look like my style.  I think it would be a huge challenge to stop buying things made elsewhere so additional options would be to buy secondhand items to prolong their life at least and to actually wear out the clothing you have now.

I want to be clear that I think everyone in the world should be able to earn a good living.  I am focused on the environmental cost and the human cost of lowest cost production.

If you ponder and/or act on this, please share how you approach it and any resources you have found - not just limited to clothing.

While the clothes are washing

Friday is typically the day to wash our clothing and do some cleaning.  I'm having my second cup of coffee while the washing machine does its work and I wait for 2 loads of wash to expand into 4 dryer loads.

I spent some of this time browsing through the comments to Vivienne's post called Project 333: Redefining Normal which inspired me to count how many clothes I wear by counting hangers (66) which I think isn't bad for a 4 season climate.  Still I know there are several that I rarely if ever wear and then more out of guilt than anything.  As usual Vivienne illustrated her point with lovely outfits using a small wardrobe.

One commenter suggested two books to read.  My library has Overdressed: The Shockingly High Cost of Cheap Fashion and I have requested it.  The library doesn't have Life at Home in the Twenty-first Century: 32 Families Open their Doors but it sounds very interesting.  That being said I broke my goal of a shopping fast yesterday by finding a pair of lightweight dressier slacks in my size at Marshalls.  I bought them as petite clothes are hard to find and way overpriced or dowdy generally, but the slacks are a great example of the points made against buying clothing made overseas and/or out of synthetic fabrics.  I happen to love not having to iron though so I think I'll focus on minimizing my clothing purchases and continuing to really use what I have until they wear out.

We had a humdinger (who says that anymore?) of a thunderstorm last night while I was at art class.  At one point it looked like it was raining sideways and there was some good and close thunder.  I was happy to see that it didn't bring down many branches in our mini-forested yard.  Still, I keep thinking I should add picking up sticks to my resume!

Other exciting news ahead for my day (not) - getting copies made of flyers advertising the next library book sale or maybe I'll put that off until Sunday, vacuuming, making pizza dough for tonight's dinner and to freeze, and cooking a chicken breast so we can have a quick to put together curried chicken dinner tomorrow after we go see some live theater.  Play with dog is high on the list as always and perhaps I'll actually do some homework drawing for art class.  Such a day of excitement LOL.

What is going on in your thoughts and day? 

It's July which means 6 month goals for 2012

I've been noticing that I am very productive in the mornings and very unproductive in the afternoons and evenings.  I know I am a morning person but I don't like frittering away so much of my day.  The hot weather has something to do with it as all outdoor activity is done by noon and that will change with the weather in the fall.  The bigger factor I think is that I don't have any big goals that I am committed to working towards.

So here are some bigger goals for the next 6 months:

1.  Focus on physical health and fitness - this involves a lot of things but these 3 are my priority.

• Regular Pilates has been very good for my body and my energy - definately going to keep working with my trainer
• I used to routinely work out with my Gaiam am stretch DVD (there is a pm stretch workout too).  I fell out of that routine, my hip joint locked up, months of PT later and I can move it again.  Time to start this as a practice - and then maybe add the pm stretch too which will help make the afternoon more productive. 
• Actually lose those last few pound by planning food intake (especially snacks) better.  Oh menu planning, how I don't love you!

2.  Do what I can to achieve 2012 house goals without paying someone else

• Obvious priorities are to clear the undergrowth in our wooded area and hillside as well as cutting down hollies by driveway.  Keep chipping away at this (pun intended LOL).
• Talk to friend who may fix antique chair for a fee

3.  Live my money values in each spending decision I make - this of course raises the question as to what these values are.

• Time with my family - which requires travel
• Enjoyable time with my hubby & friends - may or may not cost money
• Health - preventive measures and healthcare
• Saving to finance our hopefully long lives 
• Preparing to move in 5 1/2 years - maintain home but no costly improvements & continue decluttering
• Wearing things out or, if they aren't being used, passing them on to someone who will use them

“Not what we have but what we enjoy, constitutes our abundance.” - Epicurious

When I was volunteering at the chef demo at the botanical garden yesterday (not sure why they do it on a rainy day but oh well) I noticed this quote above the fireplace.  Makes you think doesn't it?

So what do you enjoy that doesn't fit with what you have?  How much time do you spend on what you have instead of on what you enjoy?  How can you get a better balance between the two?

During this rather dull, rainy weekend with a sick hubby I mentioned the idea that when we move in 5 1/2 years (but who is counting LOL) we should only take our personal items and our dog.  Then we could start over and only have the things that fit the life we want then!  He started to say "But we should take the kitchen stuff and the living room furniture ..." so I mentioned the cost of moving it ourselves to the opposite side of the country and how old the furniture would all be by then vs. the cost of getting just what we want.  He looked thoughtful.  It is a start at least and we have a lot of time to think about it.

Letting go of expectations about how others will behave

There have been a number of situations I have encountered over the last few months where I found myself quite surprised about how people I know have behaved in certain situations.  In response to this I have been thinking about both how to respond in those situations (out loud and in my head) as well as how to have fewer expectations of others based on thinking that I know how they will act.

For the responses I've been trying out include "wow" or "that could be" as well as "hmmmm" and some other non-responsive responses.  When I actually want to engage and offer support it has been "I'm so sorry that x happened to you", "how can I help" or "is there anything I can do".  The conversations in my head are quite different and the effort there is to remind myself that I have no control over what others do (and sometimes no influence either), that people are doing the best that they can at each moment, and that it pays to be kind because none of us truly knows what burdens another carries.

Letting go of expectations is a bit harder for me as it may be for others.  I think I know how people I have known a long time will respond or how a reasonable person will respond to a given situation.  And yet I am continually surprised!  This seems like it will be an ongoing learning process as the variations available from different people seems to be endless - and endlessly interesting.

Now I have 13 Happiness Commandments

I was watching the news while away and listened to all the glowing remembrances of Dick Clark as a person.  Everyone they interviewed repeatedly mentioned what a kind man he was.  That is not an accolade you hear about many people from so many people.  I spent some time thinking about whether that would be the first thing people would think of to say about me and really don't think it is.  I would like it to be in the top 3 at least!

So my baker's dozen Happiness Commandments list now has "Be Kind" as number 13.  I'll be thinking about changes I want to make to have that be a larger part of who I am to the world.